bloodshot eyes from staying up late reading all your old entries. the way your words paint pictures then throw them away amazes me. i never told anyone because i didnt think it was relevant. or maybe it was and i was just too ignorant to see it. ive been walking through industrial fields of "i dont give a shit" and "youre amazing" all alone. it may be nice to have some company. though i'm sick of everything you do, i love it. this other world is my secret place that only you know about. i go there for comfort because we both know i'm socially awkward. you're never there anymore. your hints are amusing. your way of distracting us is confusing. if you would just come out and say what we want you to say, all would be normal again. but you're not. you're hiding. and we're slowly but surely fading. at this point it's safe to say that you may not remember me, but you're permanently burned into my memory. not because of what you have now that you didnt have before. but because of what you had before that grew into what you have now. and because of the way you've taken time out of your life to help me. i only hope that at some point i can return the favor somehow. but you're making it impossible.
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Where can I go when I want you around,
but I cant stand to be around you?
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